


Tigers don't cry over broken hearts

by PetitLu



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: (implied) - Freeform, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Friendship, Implied Relationships, Light Angst, Multi, One-Sided Phichit Chulanont/Katsuki Yuuri, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-15
Updated: 2019-08-15
Packaged: 2020-09-01 08:24:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20255122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PetitLu/pseuds/PetitLu
Summary: Sometimes, all it takes to break through months of repressed feelings is a party, an empty hallway and a shoulder to cry on.In which Yuri is sad, Phichit is awesome, and sometimes friends hurt you without realizing it.





	Tigers don't cry over broken hearts

If he thought about it, Yuri was to blame. They had not registered on each other’s radar before he introduced them in passing at last season’s Rostelecom. Now there he was in the back of the room, avoiding any trace of couple-y happiness. He would have gotten drunk and let all his usual anger loose, but he was afraid he would instead turn into a crying, pathetic mess worthy of Kastudon’s best hits. So, he also kept away from the alcohol and tried to become one with the wall in hopes of escaping people’s notice. 

A loud laugh drew his gaze towards the center of the room where Mila was twirling between Victor and Chris, jacket discarded and dress flowing behind her. Katsudon was looking at the scene with a fond smile and chatting with Phichit. Yuri kept his eyes away from the couch where Otabek was sitting. A buzzing in his pocket managed to direct his attention to his Instagram feed for a while, but he kept going back to his friends dancing. Mila looked happy like this, carefree.

Suddenly, the air felt too warm. He hurried through the doors to the hallway, unnoticed. The heavy, stifling weight on his chest abated as the doors closed on the music and the delighted laughs of the other skaters. The curtains around the open windows fluttered in the night breeze, creating moving patterns on the opposite wall . Sharp shadows spread around the room as a car moved past and temporarily drowned the sounds of the party. Yuri unlocked his phone and put it away again. He wanted to go home. It had been almost a year since he had last been to Moscow. 

Numbness filled his brain. He fought back against the sounds that clawed at his throat like he had done since he got Mila’s photo last summer, her smug but fond look with Otabek’s arm around her waist an innocent, unthinking punch to Yuri’s gut. Back then he had felt like either throwing up or screaming until his throat got sore. He had done neither. He had called Yuuri, unwilling to explain to Victor why he was asking, and had borrowed the car. He had driven without a destination, and it was a miracle he did not get arrested. Back at Katsudon and the old man’s apartment, devoid of Victor – Yuri suspected other Yuuri’s “subtle” nudging – he had gotten a tea mug placed in his hands and a soft voice talking about how everyone in Hasetsu was doing.

Now there was no tea and no retelling of the triplets’ latest scheme. Yuri stared at the shadows on the wall, trying to escape the tangle of emotions his friends’ relationship elicited. He had been successful so far in avoiding reminders of it, ignoring Mila’s secret smiles at her phone and Otabek’s sporadic social media updates, but in such proximity his usual escaping maneuvers failed. He collapsed on the carpet and put his head between his knees. The music in the other room changed, once, twice. He remained motionless.

With a soft click, the door opened. Given the careful gesture, Yuri assumed it was neither Mila nor Victor, but did not raise his head. A moment passed. He felt the other person’s gaze on him. After a minute or two spent in silence, he looked up. Surprise pierced through the sadness. Chulanont was staring at him, no judgement on his open face. Yuri and Phichit had never been friends, but a few seasons of competing against each other and Yuri being a frequent – but reluctant - tag along to Katsuki’s competitions had made him appreciate his competitor. 

Without a word, said man approached and slid down to the floor. Like Yuri, he put his knees against his chest, and turned his eyes back to him. “I know you don’t want to talk about it”, he stated in a low voice. “So, I’ll talk instead. I won’t pretend to understand what you feel, but I know what it’s like. To have a best friend that’s so special to you.” He paused. While he looked somewhat grave, there was no trace of pity or uncertainty in his demeanor. “It hurts to see them go. Even when you know it’s the love of their life, if there even is such a thing, it hurts.” He stopped again and looked away. “Sometimes you just… You just need to accept that pain and let it out. You can’t control it forever. You know you can’t avoid them all the time, and I know enough about you to assume you don’t actually want them to break up.”

At that, Yuri turned his head, eyes widening. Chulanont pining for his best friend was surprising but understandable. Him thinking Yuri incapable of that kind of pettiness was less so. He had not thought the man had looked close enough to know that about him. Yuri wondered for an uncomfortable moment if he was that transparent with his feelings. Phichit turned back towards him and let out a soft laugh. “You’re not easy to read Plisetsky, but like I said, I’ve been there. Your friends are happy, so even if you’re not, you don’t want that happiness to end.” 

A muffled cry escaped Yuri, the first sound he had let out since the politeness requirements of the night had been fulfilled. He felt his hands, clenched around his legs, shake. Phichit tactfully ignored it and continued. “It’s okay, you know. If you’ve thought about it. And it’s okay to avoid seeing how happy they are head on. I had more time and more distance to deal with it, so I could loudly announce a marriage in a crowded restaurant and be sincere and happy, but you don’t have to hide from everyone and lock away your pain in a deep dark place.”

A tremor shook through Yuri’s body. Another one followed, and he was shaking, fighting against the stubborn tears he had refused to shed for half a year. Acting on an impulse, he grabbed Phichit and squashed his own face against the other man’s shoulder. A dark spot spread against the sleeve of Phichit’s jacket, but he did not make a move to get his arm back. A clock ticking somewhere in the building counted second after second, and neither of them moved. Yuri could not have said how long he stayed there, shedding silent tears over feelings that went nowhere, guilt and love and friendship tangled together in a mess Yuri could not unravel. 

After a while, he raised his eyes and looked at Phichit. The man offered his hand, and they got up. Not a word was uttered. They dusted their clothes and looked towards the doors. Phichit removed his jacket and placed it on a coat rack before putting his hand on the handle in a silent question. Yuri shook his head but gestured at him to go on. Once Phichit was gone, he sent a text to Katsudon and Victor letting them know he was going back to the hotel. He called his grandpa and forgot his homesickness for a while.

He went back home. The competition season continued and brought with it medals and disappointment, Victor and Katsudon-related annoyance, slightly awkward encounters with Otabek. Yuri did not know if the old man had talked to Mila, but slowly their friendship went back to normal. That is, she lifted him over her head one day and did not put him down until Yakov started turning purple. A few weeks after the party, Phichit Chulanont got a message simply reading “thank you”.

**Author's Note:**

> Not beta'ed, all mistakes are mine. Feel free to point it out if you see something I didn't notice.  
thank you Bearixt for the encouragement <3


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